It's been over a year. This place -- the entry text box -- carries with it a certain anxiety. I have to be in a particular mood to write here. A sullen desperation.

I had heart failure three months ago. Exactly three months ago, to the day, actually. I'm on meds and haven't worked in as long. I have a pacemaker in my chest. A metal box that will shock me if it stops again. It can't be seen from the outside, but it can be felt. I'm officially a cyborg.

I dumped the man who has literally been the worst person in my life, a little under a year ago. I wish I could go back and dump him again for emphasis.

I'm reading War & Peace and playing a lot of Neopets, and I'm here at Diaryland again. It's like I'm 17 again. Mostly I missed a certain person I read, and decided to update, even though I probably don't have any readers.

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