My life here is filled with shame. Of myself, of my actions, of my friends. I feel as though I've committed some disgusting and filthy act by growing up. By leading my own life. Like it's something that shouldn't be seen. Knowing these people are seeing me live my life makes me feel like I'm being watched in the bathroom. Exposed.

My life here is little other than submission. And I suppose that's really why I came here in the first place, to submit to the sadness and let my family run my life for a while. So I won't have to take responsibility for my actions and emotions, perhaps. I was rather tired of that, but isn't action and emotion just... a part of life? I'm still learning.

Maybe it's over-thinking things. I just know I'm not me, and I'm not happy.

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