I spoke to my professor today. I went in to ask if I could even pass the class after killing myself to finish my research paper on time, and he decided to give me an Incomplete. So I just have to turn in a short paper (from before, that I never turned in) when everyone else is turning in their final assignments, and he'll give me until DECEMBER to finish my research paper. It definitely won't take that long, but it gives me an extra month after the semester ends to get my shit together.

I started crying after I left his office because I'm so embarrassed about it all. Telling people about my depression. It seems like such a failure, even though I know it isn't. I just feel like a failure, really.

Afterwards, I went to the clinic on campus and got prescriptions for Paxil and Ativan. Currently on a dose of Ativan to study, and then I'll start taking the Paxil tonight. We'll see how it goes. I'm a little anxious about the Paxil, as I've never had it before, but I think I'm okay with the risk.

So graduation is still on track for now.

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