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I don't like people, and that's okay.
People are insane. I take a large amount of pride in the fact that I have very little to do with them most of the time.

For a long time it didn't phase me. I wanted companionship, sure, but I was happy alone. I had a lot of room to think.

Then I started dating. Some of them became friends, some of them became one-night stands, some of them I never spoke to again. And I realized I didn't give a shit about any of them. That's when I started wondering if I'm just selfish.

But now that I'm alone again (and barely have any actual friends to speak of anymore), I know I'm not selfish. Well. Maybe a little. But I don't think that's a bad thing, really. It's all about priorities. And other people aren't high up on that list for me.

I'm taking a psychology course, so I've been thinking a lot about how it applies to me (because I'm the center of my universe). The way people turn out, even the basic structure of their brains, is a crapshoot. Genetics and conditioning combine to form each person.

I think this is largely genetic for me. No one could really tell I was stuck in my head because I was so good at faking it, similar to how I am now. This is just how I turned out. I don't like people, and that's okay.

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2010-06-16 @ 12:00 a.m.