HOME OLDER PROFILE NOTES DIARYLAND
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The future...
I've been looking at homes for sale, not because I'm in the market (far from it, I'm still unemployed), but because I honestly can't wait to think about buying.

A while ago, I thought about what I see in my future. Ten years from now, or so. And I'm always alone. No relationship, no roommate, no family. I tend to picture my home high off the ground; a large condo with open windows, no curtains. Modern, straight lines, black and white. Calm, quiet and peaceful. I'd do yoga every day and would ignore any and all influence from the outside world.

I would cook for myself every night that I don't go out with friends.

I think I'd like to go into real estate. This isn't really anything new; I've considered it for years, but never got into it.

Right now, I'm looking at the list of the best places to live in the US. I've been looking at real estate in Portland, but am actually considering the idea that I may not go back there after all. I likely will, because nearly everyone I love is there, but. I like the idea of running away from everything familiar. I'm trying to figure out why that is. Fear or just a love of adventure. Love of emotionally safe adventure, that is.

I haven't been doing well the past few days. Friday was hell, but the weekend was all right. There's still a sense of despair under the surface, though, and am just waiting for it to pass. I'm avoiding people now more than ever.

Am hoping to go back to school in the spring, but I don't know yet what I want to study. Computer programming/analysis, real estate, legal studies. I want to go into my own business at some point, so I think real estate might be my best bet. I might take a few classes in each to see which I feel the most comfortable in.

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2008-09-22 @ 8:04 p.m.